I know I should probably post about the holidays, but I just don't feel like it right now. Maybe as it gets closer. Or maybe between Christmas and New Year's Days. Or maybe not at all.
I want to post about celebrities we couldn't care less about (and yes, you New Englanders, it IS "COULD NOT care less about" not "COULD care less about"). Why bother posting if I couldn't care less? Well, because, I am just taking my guilty pleasure a little too seriously right now.
I think there are two types of serious celebrity gossip: Oscar-worthy, serious, film analysis and deconstruction, and US Weekly cover-worthy pablum for those of us who like to "read it at the gym."
Now, when it should be a time for buzz and news and all things Oscar, I have to see Jennifer Aniston everywhere for the feel-good (gag) movie of the season, Marley and Me. High school freshmen girls are going to say that's the best movie ever. I'd rather see Slumdog Millionaire. And I really don't care what Aniston thinks about Angelina Jolie or feels for John Mayer, The Poser, or that she's naked in GQ. I am sick of her already. And her best role was in 2002's The Good Girl - almost seven years ago.
I am also really tired of Spencer and Heidi. Could they please go away quietly? It's uber sad that I even know who they are -- it is taking up valuable brain space away from other useless trivia I could carry around for the next Trivia Night. Do E! or US Weekly or TMZ really think we care? Britney and other train wrecks and their respective "comebacks" we care about, us slaves to celebrity gossip. Can they even differentiate between "good" and "bad" pablum? Apparently not.
If I can't see Philip Seymour Hoffman or Meryl Streep, I wanna read about J Lo's marital troubles (thank you, US Weekly, for returning to solid A List gossip this week--the spread on Heidi and Spencer's wedding almost made me stop buying the mag). Look, there are A list stories to go with A list celebrities, and these shows and magazines are just giving us mostly B and C list news -- Marie Osmond? C'mon!! What's going on with Clint or Clooney?
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Watching ET tonight and yes, I do feel the need to shower, and surprise, surprise one of the stories will be Anna Nicole's new tombstone....seriously. I think the problem is that boobs, booty and stupidity have become the new ideals of celebrity.And death is not a deterrent. And sadly because I watch this dreck, I'm contributing to this. I miss the old studio system, they may have protected the stars but at least we didn't have to see the waxed nether regions of some idiot who is too stressed?/pre-occupied with whirled peas?/brain dead to figure out how to put on a thong before going out.
Yes, to the A-list. No, to the talentless.
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